I have been ecstatic and devastated this week, mostly over things that don’t matter at all. The conclusion I’ve come to is that I think way too highly of myself, I overestimate the importance of my work, and I tie in my complete worth as a human with what I can (or can’t) create in a photograph. In a lot of ways I lack love and humility.

Ok. now that I’ve established that,

It’s so tiring being afraid of failure, and in a field based on perception, it seems like at any given time I either feel overly confident or completely useless, rarely in between. I have been equating progress with success, or a series of increasing successes, but I’m starting to think that progress exists only in terms of motives and perspective, both of which have been askew in my life for quite some time.

There is always hope for change. I miss the Fijians who really understood that.

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